❌ No More "Fake it Till You Make It".. Here’s How to Build Confidence That Lasts & Make Extra Money from Home

Have you ever wanted to feel more confident, bigger, bolder, braver, and unapologetically YOU, but then the nice girl, the quiet one .. the one who smiles when she wants to scream, the one who holds back so no one else feels uncomfortable.. creeps in? That faint, familiar voice that lives in the deep corners of our mind starts whispering again: "Tone it down," "Quit being too much," "What will they think?"

You know the voice. I knew it too.

If so, I see you. I was you.

As a lifelong introvert, I’ve danced with confidence in both boots and heels. One of my earliest memories of stepping into courage came from my dad while showing my Quarter Horse "Tio" in the arena. He’d say: "Square your shoulders, sit taller, smile, heels down, chin up and ride forward." That advice wasn’t just for the show ring. It was for life.

Back then, I didn’t realize how much that message would stay with me. But years later, as a woman building a business, speaking on Zooms, or simply walking into a crowded room, I still hear my dad’s voice reminding me that I belong. That I’m capable. That I don’t need to change who I am to feel confident.. I just need to keep showing up as myself.

And today, I want to offer 6 "Roxified" ways to step into confidence without faking it, forcing it, or flipping your personality inside out. These aren’t gimmicks. They’re small, soul-deep shifts that help you show up as the amazing woman you already are. (Yes, this is Tio and I 1985!)

1. Prioritize Your Happiness Every Single Day

You hear “self-care” tossed around like confetti. But this "self care", "self love" isn’t about pedicures and bath bombs. It’s about doing the things that make you feel alive and rooted.

A happy woman gets more done with more grace, more energy, and less guilt. She handles her day with a steadier heartbeat. That’s not selfish. That’s smart.

Quick Tip: Carve out one thing a day that sparks joy.. a walk through crunchy leaves, a playlist that pulls you back to life, your favorite cinnamon chai, or journaling in your warm flannels beside a flickering candle.

(PS, even flipping through older photo albums can bring joy, just like looking for that photo of Tio and I. Grab a few of them put them on your fridge or near your laptop for extra happy moments.)

Want a shortcut? Keep a "happy list" nearby.. a few things that always lift your spirits. Some days, just looking at that list reminds you that you’re still here, still growing.

2. Drop the Habit of People-Pleasing

This one’s straight from my mom: "Frankly Scarlett, I don’t give a damn." It’s not about being rude. It’s about not making yourself smaller just to keep others comfortable.

You don’t owe your time, energy, or peace to everyone. And you sure don’t need to earn your place in anyone’s story. You’re allowed to grow past who you used to be. Hello ...... WE Are Supposed to Grow! Gee Wiz!! If they don't like it they don't have to look!

(This is a video I did back ten years ago, you want to listen to some straight up sass and real talk? Even I give this a listen when I need a kick in the butt and get my own head screwed on straight again like my Mom would say.. Enjoy xx Roxanne)

I learned this one the hard way. I used to say “yes” with a barbie doll fake smile plastered on my face when I meant “hell no” because I didn’t want to be seen as difficult. But every time I did that, I chipped away at my own boundaries.

Affirmation: “I release the need for approval and make space for peace.”

3. Let the Right People In

Confidence doesn’t mean doing life solo. It means choosing your circle on purpose.

Surround yourself with women who:

• Cheer when you rise
• Tell you the truth with love
• Mirror your strength back to you when you’ve forgotten it

And don’t forget.. be that woman for yourself, too.

If you’ve ever had a coffee chat with a friend who left your soul lighter in under ten minutes, don’t let her go. Keep her close. Those women are your 🍂 fall lifeline when the winds pick up and the days get darker.

4. Watch Your Inner Dialogue Like a Hawk

The stories we whisper to ourselves are louder than we think.

Maybe it’s the echo of a moment when you froze in gym class. Maybe it’s a voice that sounds a lot like your old boss. Or someone who should’ve been kinder.

But guess what? You’re the one in charge now.

Would you talk to someone you love the way you talk to yourself? Probably not.

Try this: “I’m still learning.” “I’ve made it through worse.” “I’m not behind.. I’m becoming.”

Sticky notes help. I keep them on my mirror. Reminders like “You’ve done hard things before” or “You don’t have to rush to be valid.” "That you even showed up counts the most." Words matter. Yours most of all.

Pair your inner dialogue with a Courage Journal .. that encourages you to build courageous habits, embrace daily reflections, offering thought-provoking prompts to explore personal fears and challenges.

5. Be Real Even If It Feels Scary

People don’t connect with perfect. They connect with honest.

When we try to keep it all together, never let anything slip, we end up feeling more alone.. and less seen.

Your real story.. the one with plot twists, detours, ugly cries, and unfinished edges, is powerful. It makes people feel less alone.

I used to think my mess would scare people off. Instead, it made the right people lean in. It brought DMs like: “Thank you.. I thought I was the only one.”

So if you’re building a business or sharing your truth online, say the thing. Own your journey. That’s where confidence is born.

6. Take Up Space Without Apology

This one is tough. Especially if you were raised to be “nice” and “polite” and “easy to be around.”

But being confident isn’t about being loud. It’s about being rooted.

It’s the way you walk into a room like you were meant to be there. Because you were.

Soften your jaw. Stand up tall. Say less, but mean more. Speak with truth, not volume.

Try this: The next time you walk into a room, pause and breathe. Imagine your energy arriving first. You don’t need to do anything to deserve space. You already belong.

Whether you’re sipping apple cider with your grandbabies, pulling on your favorite fuzzy fall sweater, or just enjoying the crisp fall and the beauty of it all take your breath away .. 🍁let this season be the one where you remember who you are.

Final Thought: You Deserve to Be Seen

My grandma used to say we are made of stardust. You and I are supposed to be here. We're here for a reason. Confidence isn’t a switch. It’s a practice.

And every time you:

• Choose joy
• Speak your truth
• Let yourself be messy
• Stop asking for permission
• Love yourself without conditions

…you get stronger. Steadier. More whole.

Let’s stop waiting until we’re perfect. Let’s stop hiding behind busy or burnt out. Let’s show up.. raw, real, relatable, and ready.

🍁 Whether you’re starting your first side hustle from home or learning how to make extra money online during this fall reset, confidence is part of the plan.

✨ Here’s to building a life and maybe even a business that fits you.

✨ Here’s to the next chapter.. bolder, braver, and more beautifully YOURS.

🌻 Cheers and chat soon, Roxanne

Ps ... Your free gift today .. My Faith based reflection journal 🌟.. it's free to download 🦋

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